Counterbalance

My last post ruffled a few people which I guess was and was not my intent. I plan to write more on the subject once I organize my thoughts a little better. I want to stress that I am a staunch supporter of adoption. The joys of adoption, like the joys of parenthood overall, more than make up for the challenges... Yesterday Dart, Nina and I went out to lunch. At the restaurant we ran into someone we know. He greeted Nina and asked her what her name was, "I Nina Bea" she said patting her chest. THEN she motioned to Dart and said, "that Daddy". Turning to me she put her hand on my leg and said "that Mommy". Our first introductions by our daughter. A small thing that meant the world to us.

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You Know You're Adopted When...

I found this on Facebook. It is from a group of nearly 500 Adoptees. The quotes below were submitted by the members of this group. Some of the comments are painful and raw and it was difficult for me to read these and not feel distressed and even guilty. But as uncomfortable as this made me I think it is important for me to remember that Nina will have her own feelings and opinions about HER adoption and they won't necessarily be positive.

• You know you're adopted when the word "grateful" sets your teeth on edge.
• You know you're adopted when you can't get a passport because the only birth certificate you're allowed to have is so inconsistent or incomplete that the passport office won't accept it.
• You know you're adopted when your birth certificate says you were born in a state you've never lived in, not even for 5 minutes.
• You know you're adopted when you have no baby pictures prior to your adopted identity, because you didn't exist before then.
• You know you're adopted when your parents are allowed to abuse you because you're "lucky" they took you in at all.
• You know you're adopted when your adoptive parents are so old they have more medical appointments than you do.
• You know you're adopted when your real ethnic/racial identity is erased and you're expected to act like you're actually (fill in the blank) instead.
• You know you're adopted when you're the only brown skinned girl at your synagogue training for your Bat Mitzvah.
• You know you're adopted when the Adoption Stories on TLC makes you wanna barf.
• You know you're adopted when you're tired of being a "good adoptee"
• You know you're adopted when you smile blandly when people say, "oh, you're adopted! how cool!"
• You know you're adopted when you're thrown out of Sunday school, age 9, for asking inconvenient questions about mass, breeding, genetics, and manure about Noah's Ark, when the family have gone to that church forever and believe the dino fossils are a test by satan.
• You know you're adopted when you check the Internet several times a day to see if your first family is looking for you.
• You know you're adopted when you write letters to state senators and assembly members from any state with sealed records even if you weren't born or adopted there.
• You know you're adopted when you know more about people-finding Internet sites than the average private investigator.
• You know you're adopted when you can find someone in the US Census without a name.
• You know you're adopted when you have no clue who gave birth to you.
• You know you're adopted when you secretly want to smash your b-day cake.
• You know you're adopted when you can pretend you don't know your aparents when out in public together.
• You know you're adopted when the news of an older couple adopting an infant as their first child makes you wanna puke.
• You know you're adopted when your birth certificate is a joke.
• You know you're adopted when you visit the doctor and have repeat over and over that no, you really don't know your medical history.
• You know you're adopted when...your birth certificate is a false record and there is no actual corresponding birth in official birth records.
• You know you're adopted when ..when you hear Madonna's song "Papa Don't Preach" and start to cry.
• You know you're adopted when you are mortified by having to do those "around the room" introductions.
• You know you're adopted when you played "kidnapping" instead of "tea parties".
• You know you're adopted when you always fuck up your relationships for no good reason.
• You know you're adopted when "Adopt a Highway" signs make you want to hurl.
• You know you're adopted when you know what AP, PAP, OBC, ABC, and any combination of letters starting with B, N, or F stand for.
• You know you're adopted when all your dolls and stuffed animals had feelings and you felt guilty about having a favorite.
• You know you're adopted when a "family tree" assignment in school gives you an anxiety attack.
• You know you're adopted when you're supposed to be interested in history class, but are not supposed to show interest in your own history.
• You know you're adopted when a stranger becomes your mother, and your mother becomes a stranger.
• You know you're adopted when you see people's reaction once they hear your name.
• You know you're adopted when you don't look like your parents but you look like the doll they gave you.
• You know you're adopted when you named your cabbage patch kid "baby girl"
• You know you're adopted when you take your own babies pictures and try to pass them off as your "real sisters"
• You know you're adopted when you ask your mommy to buy you a baby sister at the grocery store.
• You know you're adopted when your parents can't tell you how big you were at birth or what time of day your were born at.
• You know you're adopted when you have a childhood fantasy where you're part of a large family where all the siblings look alike AND look like the parents.
• You know you're adopted when hearing the word 'adoption' makes your hear skip a beat--and not in a good way.
• You know you're adopted when perfect strangers tell you you ought to be grateful you were 'taken in'.
• You know you're adopted when you get a minority college scholarship based on your skin color but it's quickly taken away because of your white parent's income.
• You know you're adopted when you're the only brown kid in your school.
• You know you're adopted when you have to consider your natural parents "birth parents".
• You know you're adopted when you have to consider your adoptive parents your "real parents".
• You know you're adopted when the government says you have no right to no who gave birth to you.
• You know you're adopted when you're having sex and a guy asks, "Who's your Daddy?" and you cry.
• You know you're adopted when both your parents are white but your not.
• You know you're adopted when you were born from your mothers heart because she already hit menopause.
• You know you're adopted when people ask you if you would have rather been an abortion.
• You know you're adopted when someone has to tell you who your REAL mother is.
• You know you're adopted when you request a DNA test instead of a STI test every time you meet someone new!
• You know you're adopted when you have more of an IQ than your entire A-family put together, and they can't help you out with your G&T homework age 10 because the math is too hard.
• You know you're adopted when you do a family tree of your 'family'.... and there's no features. At all.
• You know you're adopted when you go to the pound and get the dog with three legs, half an ear (total), no tail, and want the rest of them too.

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Traveling Fools

Dart and I just booked our first grown up only trip since the arrival of our dear daughter. (I know –guess we are in a traveling mood.) We are so grateful that Dart’s mother is able to watch the kids while we are gone. Nina has formed quite a close bond with her Gramma and Papa and we trust them completely.

Dart and I will be heading to San Francisco for his birthday in August. We plan to rent a Harley and take a motorcycle tour over the Golden Gate Bridge to Napa Valley /Calistoga; we’ll also be visiting Muir Woods, Sausalito, and hitting a few other highlights in the San Fran area.

In preparation today Dart took me to State 8 Motorcycle shop (where I was right at home-NOT!) and bought me my first honest to goodness motorcycle jacket. It is classic black leather with buckles and belts-a full on Fonzie jacket. He tells me it will keep me warm, I guess, but I am not so sure it will go with my pink and lavender Vespa helmet.

However silly we look I think Dart and I are really going to enjoy our adult’s only adventure. I promise to post plenty of pictures for your blog stalking amusement. Now though I must decide whether to get a tattoo or pierce my lip…

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Spending our 20th Anniversary in Athens

I am so excited I could squeal, ooops I just did :). We just booked a 14 day Christmas cruise. It's Nina's first big family vacation and it is awesome if I do say so myself. I would have preferred to be home for Christmas since we were away last year (in KZ adopting Nina) but scheduling is tough these days. We usually go away for a couple of weeks in the summer but we actually could not find 14 days in a row that we were all available. Just crazy. So Christmas time it is.

During the cruise we will be celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary, 1st "gotcha" day and Nina's 3rd birthday. That's in addition to Christmas and New Year's. Party cruise for the Printy's! I really need this to look forward to.



Here is where we will be going. (I would appreciate any travel tips including travel with baby tips.) These are all new places for us; Barcelona Spain, Rome & Naples Italy, Alexandria Egypt, Rhodes Athens & Crete Greece, Ephesus Turkey.

Also if anyone has contacts for private tour guides in any of these cities we would love to hear from you.

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Just a Little Bit Snarky

I am not really sure why I continue to tick off the months but I do....Today marks 22 months since we logged in to adopt in China. Since then NOTHING has happen to our documents other than perhaps the accumulation of a thick layer of dust. Until now that is.

This month our dossier has been moved to "Review" status. I guess that is progress from the last 22 months in the "Growing Mold" status. Pretty ridiculous to think we started working on our Chinese adoption back in October of 2006, effectively we have waited almost 3 years for a review!

Does that mean we are making progress, picking up steam to go to China? NO. The wait is still long and getting longer. In 22 months the CCAA has processed a whopping 4 months worth of dossiers. Right now we seem to be on track for a match sometime around 2015, of course that's just me being optimistic.

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180 Days and Counting 'till Forever

Special Delivery...Our shy Nina a few days after we arrived in Ohio

Today marks the six month anniversary of Nina’s homecoming. How strange that it feels like she just got here and at the same time like she’s always been here. Dart, the Boys and I are still pretty ga-ga over her, none of our initial excitement diminished. While you might expect that of parents I think it is pretty awesome that Nina’s brothers still treat her like a new toy. She is without a doubt the shining star in our family.

Our confident daughter, 4th of July weekend on the boat

So in 180 days here are just a few of the highlights and accomplishments of our dear daughter...

Nina is tiny, not yet even on the growth charts, but she is growing. Since coming home she has grown from just under 30 inches to 33.5 inches and her weight is up from 20.5 to a whopping 23.5 pounds. She came home wearing size 9-12 month clothes and now almost fits into size 18 months (except sometimes her pants suddenly fall down to her ankles). Ok so she won’t likely play hockey or football, that’s OK by me.

Let’s talk hair. 6 months ago Nina’s hair was sparse and brittle, as much scalp as curl, a result of poor nutrition I am sure. Today, when I ask Nina how many curls she has she says “ tooooooo many”. It is true; her little head is surrounded by a halo of springy corkers. When it’s wet her hair stretches past her shoulders and now we can actually make pig tails and clip in barrettes and bows. Perhaps by the one year mark we will actually consider a haircut. Perhaps.

Nina’s favorite foods are; eggs, peanut butter, pickles, cereal (mostly frosted mini wheat’s and lucky charms), french fries, ketchup, pizza, carrots and freeze pops. If she weren’t two, I would swear she is pregnant.




She talks-a lot. As much as any two and a half year old is supposed to talk. My favorite Nina sayings are;
o “Hi Nina”-her greeting to everyone…hey that’s how people greet her.
o “mommy’s bed”-that means mommy I am tired, let’s go cuddle on your bed.
o “no”, “don’t do that”, “go away”-a slew of normal, surly 2 year old stuff J
o “Teemu”-that’s the dogs name and she yells for him anytime a crumb of food is dropped
o “I’ll be right back…stay right there”-with a raised finger of authority.
o “Where’s Nina’s make up? I need makeup”-well of course she does.
o “Daddy more tickles”-remember when she was afraid of him?
o “Please”, “thank you”, “bless you”, “sorry”-she is very polite.


Nina’s favorite color is orange and sometimes yellow. She can name; purple, blue, black, yellow, orange, green, red. She will dig for 10 minutes in the bag of lollipops to find an orange one.

She is potty trained.



She taught herself to swim. She now swims both under water and does a heck of a dog paddle. She slides head first into the pool and jumps off the back of the boat.



Nina had her first trip to the ER


Nina took gymnastics lessons and won her first medal.

Aside from her trip from central Asia to Ohio, Nina has been to; Orlando FL, San Antonio TX, and Nashville TN.

She went to Disney and met her first princess.

She had her first birthday cake and party. She also attended a birthday party. Also she was the guest of honor at her own welcome home party. She’s basically a party girl.

Nina celebrated Easter. She colored eggs and participated in her first easter egg hunt. She wore her first frilly Easter dress.



She has had first car, plane, bike, boat, bicycle and stroller rides.



Nina loves Barney and Kids Bop. She loves to sing; Itsy Bitsy Spider, Hokey Pokey, Row Your Boat, Happy Birthday and sadly anything by Pink or the Spice Girls.

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Big Booms!

Nina celebrated her first 4th of July as an American citizen with a family picnic and a concert at Blossom. "Watching" from the safety of Daddy's lap and under a blankey, Nina dubbed the fireworks at the end of the night, "big booms". While she wasn't too sure about the fireworks we learned our little Russian princess loves Tchaikovsky, (well of course).

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