Missing (you) so much

I got a new picture of my Baby Butterfly and my heart skipped a beat.  She looked so different and I realized how much she is changing and how much I am missing.

I should be excited and happy to get any update, most moms waiting for their children in China get one update the whole time, some get nothing.  And I am appreciative that I have them.

And yet at the same time it drives home the point that I missing so much. This baby who was still two when I first found her waiting for a family will be nearly four by the time I have her in my arms.  I swallow hard when I think about it, the loss of time...and so much more.

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