Virtual Twins (Part One)

I may have created a monster.

Having two children, girls no less, separated in age by just 123 days presents a unique set of issues.  For us the biggest is that of never ending sibling rivalry combined with an obsessive need to be exactly like the other.

I’ve been a mom for more than 20 years but honestly this is new for me.  The boys are 4 and 5 YEARS apart.  More like three only children than anything else.  They didn’t compete with each other as much as they worked to distinguish themselves as individuals. We could handle that.

Not so for my virtual Asian Irish twins.

Macy (who seems more like the first born than last in), is fixated on fairness. For her the drive to assure exact sameness supersedes everything else including personal desire.  It goes something like this;

Me:  Macy do you want strawberry ice cream or vanilla?

Macy:  What does Nina have?

Me: Nina has chocolate.

Macy: I want chocolate.

Me: You don’t like chocolate ice cream.

Macy: I want the same kind as Nina.

Me: Ok (sigh)

Macy: (takes one bite), I don’t like chocolate.

To help Macy gain some self esteem, confidence and independence from Nina I have really been playing up the fact that she is the “big” sister.  Technically.

We use the word Jie Jie which means older sister in Chinese just to add an extra bit of Macy pride.

Let me tell you Macy has fully embraced her role as do-good, in charge, number one sister.  In fact I may have to promote her to Assistant Parent very soon. If I’m not careful she might even take my job!

She is now CONSTANTLY correcting Nina and any other errant sibling in her midst.

I'm the boss!  Do what I say and no one gets hurt.

"Nina don’t climb up there."

"Nina pick up your toys."

"Nina time to go to bed."

Yesterday Nina was jumping on my treadmill.  The girls know the treadmill is off limits.  Nina however is all about testing limits.

Macy took charge right away telling Nina to get off the treadmill.  When Nina failed to comply Macy stomped over to me to inform me of her sisters’s evil deed.  “Mama, Nina is on your tread- a-mill”.

I went into the room, Macy my trusted lieutenant at my side and told Nina to get off the treadmill.  Of course the little imp just kept running and acted like she didn’t hear me, (more on this in Part Two). 

But before I could do anything else Macy, her voice filled with contempt looked at me and indignantly instructed, “Mommy. Count!”

Dutifully I began, “one, two” and Nina jumped off the treadmill.

Macy beamed.  Her work complete.  “Good job Mommy, you’re a good mama”.

Gee thanks Macy.

(You kind of scare me.)

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