I woke up this morning and I was feeling a bit emotional, melancholy, downright veclempt and at first I wasn’t sure why. Was it because I turned 43 today? I don’t think so. I mean 43 isn’t a milestone of any particular importance other than the fact that I am undeniably middle aged. Heck the kids would say I’ve been there for at least 10 years and who cares, I tell people I almost 50 all the time. (Better they think, “damn she looks good for age”, right?). Maybe it’s the fact that I tried on swimsuits last night? There’s a way to suck your serotonin dry. (I don’t mean to digress but hey Nordstrom’s, do you think you could find a way to light the dressing room as NOT to accentuate my every freaking line, wrinkle and cellulite dimple?!) Anyway I don’t think it’s the swimsuits either- skip a meal and spray on a tan and I’ll be fine. Really I think the reason I’m feeling so emotional is Kiefer. This whole high school graduate thing is hitting me in a most unexpected way.
Our house has been a fury of graduation activity for weeks. There were the three proms, the class trips, the Passport Award ceremony, Senior Leadership Luncheon, senior presentation, portraits, cap and gown, announcements, year book and on and on….This morning I woke to find a house full of soon to be graduates sleeping on couches and floors. It was the second night in a row that this group camped overnight, mostly working thru the night, to finish the senior class slide show. Armed with Mac Books and Chipotle they finished up sometime in the early morning hours today-the same day the movie will be shown. By 7am they were all waking and dressing in dress shirts and ties, readying for yet another award ceremony, recognition luncheon and various other graduation festivities. Despite the chronic lack of sleep Kiefer was full of energy and obviously excited about the day. He was happy, celebrating and he should. Today was Kiefer’s LAST day of school.
Now I know he’s going to college and there will be other graduations to come but today I am feeling this incredible combination of relief and joy. (For my fellow adoptive parents, I can only compare this to the moment I carried Nina across the tarmac and boarded the plane to take her home.) It has not been easy getting Kiefer thru school. He got his label when he was in 3rd grade “gifted with a specific learning disability in written expression” and just for kicks a dash of “Attention Deficient Disorder”. I will never forget the doctors at the Cleveland Clinic saying he will probably never finish high school or go to college. Not for a second did we accept that. In fact I dismissed them and their alphabet soup letters of accreditation right then.
It wasn’t easy. Some years we made progress, some years we didn’t. Sometimes we had great teachers, many times we didn’t. There were tears and yelling and late nights and teacher conferences and summer school and private tutors, 2 private schools and 5 public schools. Heck we even bought a second house in the Kent school district just to get him to his current highschool. It was never easy, never. Much of the credit goes to Dart who pulled the yeoman’s load throughout these high school years. I promise you there has not been a more determined and dedicated teacher and father than this man. But most of the credit has to go to Kiefer. I am so amazed that despite struggling from almost day one he got up every day and WANTED to go to school. Honestly I can’t imagine wanting to do something day after day that I knew was going to kick my ass. As a testimony to his good attitude Kiefer was even voted “Mr. School Spirit” by his classmates. Wild.
And so here we are 9 years post label and Kiefer IS graduating high school albeit on his terms. Today he writes beautifully with a sense of passion and original style. He even ended up writing for the school newspaper. ADD seems to have taken a backseat to organizing student rallies and editing senior class slide shows. He was recognized by the school faculty as a Senior Class Leader and is being honored later today. Kiefer is not only going to college in the fall, he is going with almost a semesters worth of college credit he earned while still in high school.
Maybe some parents see high school graduation as just a stop along the way to the next degree but not me. I take none of it for granted. That is why I’m filled with emotion, on the verge of tears and brink of exhaustion. I’ve been holding my breath for a very long time and this morning I realized I could finally let it out.