Adoption Makes you do Crazy Things





Just take the mail for instance.  We have to mail a lot of VERY IMPORTANT documents when adopting.  They don’t call it a “Paper Pregnancy” for nothing.  These certified, authenticated, apostilled, more valuable than gold documents are far too PRECIOUS for regular US post!

Oh No! All documents MUST be sent by overnight courier.

That said, a sign that you might have gone off the adoption deep end might be;

1.   You opened a personal Fed Ex accounts to send all important adoption documents in 12 hours or less.  You inquire if “guaranteed overnight” comes with a "penalty of death" clause?

my actual envelope going to USCIS
checked x3!



2.   You stake out locate the drop box with the earliest possible pick up time.  You inform driver if he is late.  You don’t actually have a package for that day since you are simply checking on his reliability for future mailings.

3.   When you actually do mail something you drop the envelope in the slot and open a minimum of 3 times to assure envelope actually drops inside.  A flashlight may be helpful at this stage. (Also one might choose to photograph envelope as it about to be dropped into the box to post in your adoption blog or baby book.)

4.   You wait near said drop box until truck arrives to empty box. You assure no package is dropped or otherwise left behind. You check the driver's ID.

5.   You consider following the truck but realize THAT would be ridiculous. 



No chance of delay..."my" box outside
FedEx Operations building

6.   Instead you opt to track your package online, hitting the “refresh” button every 5 to 10 minutes.

7.   Upon receiving an electronic confirmation that your package was delivered you call the recipient to confirm the online system is correct.  Of course,  you insist package is opened and that all items in package are described in detail to assure nothing escaped from envelope during transit.

 
And the real kick in the teeth is, after all that OCD diligence, more often than not your envelope ends up lost on some bureaucrats desk, ignored for weeks and months on end.

Which might be a subject for my next post..

I’m thinking about calling it, “WTF, MY KID IS ROTTING IN AN ORPHANAGE WHILE YOU TAKE A TWO HOUR LUNCH AT PANERA!”

I digress.

Your turn now...fess up...who has stalked the Fed Ex truck? Who's mail man has filed a TRO?  And, who has USCIS on speed dial?

Signed,
Mia's Mama
Day 13, (not) Patiently waiting for her I800a approval!